The Montauk Monster is a pit bull, a dogfighting washout who washed up a Long Island beach. You heard it here first.

Or maybe you heard it elsewhere first. Even with Google Alert, it’s not easy to keep track of the rumors, speculation and rare pieces of actual news concerning the odd-looking corpse found in late July on a beach near Montauk, New York.

First described on pop culture rag Gawker under the apotheosis-of-hipster subheading “Good Luck With Your Hell Demons,” the Montauk Monster hit the internet like a match tossed on lighter fluid. Was it the handiwork of mad government scientists at the nearby Plum Island Animal Disease Center? A member of some miraculously undiscovered species, giving silent testimony to the power of Nature, so exhaustively explored and encroached upon, to surprise?